Habits of Decency and Propriety

The habits Charlotte Mason mentions in her series of books can be outlined in basically five broad categories: mental, moral, decency and propriety, physical, and religious.

This week, let's take a look at Habits of Decency and Propriety. How's that
title for sounding intimidating? But habits of "decency and propriety" are
simply those habits that you develop in your child so he won't be "a social
outcast" (Vol. 6, p. 101). (Don't you love that description?)

And most of these habits, Charlotte believed, a child would unconsciously
learn as he lived in an atmosphere that is filled with them. "Cleanliness,
order, neatness, regularity, punctuality, are all 'branches' of infant
education. They should be about the child like the air he breathes, and he
will take them in as unconsciously" (Vol. 1, p. 125). "Every look of
gentleness and tone of reverence, every word of kindness and act of help,
passes into the thought-environment, the very atmosphere which the child
breathes; he does not think of these things, may never think of them, but
all his life long they excite that 'vague appetency toward something' out
of which most of his actions spring" (Vol. 2, p. 36).

Here are the habits she emphasized that fit well in this category of
Decency and Propriety (with a few definitions to clarify).
* Cleanliness
* Courtesy
* Kindness
* Manners
* Modesty and Purity
* Neatness ("pleasing and suitable"; similar to good taste)
* Order (everything in its place)
* Regularity (adhering to a schedule or routine)

She also briefly mentioned some other habits that fit in this category, but
didn't really elaborate on them:
* Candor (not prejudiced; sincere; respecting the opinions of others)
* Courage
* Diligence
* Fortitude (bearing hardship or discomfort with courage)
* Generosity
* Gentleness
* Meekness
* Patience
* Temperance (moderation in action, thought, or feeling)
* Thrift (careful management, especially of money)

More than once Charlotte encouraged parents to have a record of habits that
they wanted to cultivate in each child and to keep track of his or her
progress. She thought that birthdays would make good milestones for regular
evaluations and plans. "Obedience in the first year, and all the virtues of
the good life as the years go on; every year with its own definite work to
show in the training of character. Is Edward a selfish child when his fifth
birthday comes? The fact is noted in his parents' year-book, with the
resolve that by his sixth birthday he shall, please God, be a generous
child" (Vol. 2, p. 65).

Remember, focus on only one habit at a time, but be intentional. "Parents
should take pains to have their own thoughts clear as to the manner of
virtues they want their children to develop. Candour, fortitude,
temperance, patience, meekness, courage, generosity, indeed the whole role
of virtues, would be stimulating subjects for thought and teaching" (Vol.
3, p. 136).

What do you think about the idea of having a "habit record" for each child?
Would such a checklist help you to be more intentional about cultivating
good habits on a regular basis? Do any of you already have some sort of
record that helps you? What does it look like? Share your thoughts at
http://simplycharlottemason.com/home/blog/2007/1/11/habits-of-decency-and-pr
opriety/#comment

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